is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
