the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
