DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Randomize
