This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Randomize
