Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
