I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize