Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
