"it" just moved
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
