I love black thongs
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
