i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
