yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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