Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
