he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
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