Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
