he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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