Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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