I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Randomize
