ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize