i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
