I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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