Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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