How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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