There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
