Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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