Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
