With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
