somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
