The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
