is your mom at the bar?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Randomize
