Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
