oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize
