If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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