jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize