covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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