i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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