you guys were way drunker than both of me
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
