So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
