yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
