true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
