Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize