At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
