It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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