So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
