I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Randomize
