"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
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