Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
