If i could tip my vagina, i would.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
