all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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