break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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