He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
