omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
you had me at cake vodka
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
